The Power of Self-Acceptance in the LGBTQ+ Community
Feeling at home with yourself comes with challenges, especially from society, to “fit in.” Shame comes in many forms, but the worst is feeling ashamed of who you are. However, accepting yourself as LGBTQ+ is a way to strengthen relationships — with yourself and others.
What Is Self-Acceptance?
Self-acceptance is acknowledging and embracing who we are. This means accepting all facets of ourselves, even those we may not view as “positive”. There are many types of self-acceptance, the most important being unconditional self-acceptance. Below, we’ve listed the common types of self-acceptance.
- Accepting our feelings
- Accepting the way we look
- Accepting our abilities and limitations
- Accepting our past
- Accepting our flaws
Unconditional self-acceptance is achieved when we can embrace all of the characteristics listed above. When we accept ourselves fully and completely with no reserve. We understand that the practice of accepting yourself is easier said than done.
It is important to remember that we are all worthy of acceptance and love. The journey to self-acceptance is unique for each individual based on their lived experience.
Self-Acceptance vs. Self-Esteem
While they both relate to our relationship with ourselves, it’s important to understand that there are distinct differences between self-acceptance vs. self-esteem.
Self-esteem is the overall opinion we have about ourselves, including our beliefs about our limitations and abilities. Ranging from low to overly high, many people believe the healthiest level of self-esteem is somewhere in the middle where we value our strengths but are also aware of our weaknesses. Our self-esteem can change over time and is often shaped by external factors like our relationships and experiences.
Self-acceptance encompasses more than self-esteem and confidence, it’s about knowing our worth and understanding that it’s based on what we offer as a whole person. This is why it plays a crucial role in mental health and well-being. Accepting yourself can improve your self-esteem, but having high self-esteem doesn’t necessarily mean you embrace who you are.
The Importance of Self-Acceptance in the LGBTQ+ Community
As we mentioned before, self-acceptance is something everyone should practice. However, in some communities, like the LGBTQ+ community, accepting yourself can be more difficult.
Members of the LGBTQ+ community often face unique obstacles such as discrimination, a formal lack of support, and threats to their safety. The stress of dealing with these challenges, and others, has been linked to suicidal ideations and other mental health conditions. Fortunately, self-acceptance, and its many benefits, is one of the best ways to overcome these challenges.
Benefits of Focusing on Self-Acceptance
Research shows that focusing on self-acceptance leads to a variety of mental and physical benefits. Some of these include:
- Cultivates a sense of peace
- Improves well-being
- Reduces anxiety and depression
- Protects mood in the face of setbacks
- Forms a foundation for greater confidence
- Helps develop stronger relationships
- Builds capacity to distance oneself from outside expectations
- Improves work performance
- Boosts happiness
These are only a few of the benefits of focusing on self-acceptance. Once we learn to accept ourselves, we’re able to view things from new perspectives and may even find ourselves open to opportunities we weren’t open to before. For LGBTQ+ individuals, self-acceptance isn’t only important for overcoming challenges, but also for finding security through community support.
Just because self-acceptance is focused on the individual, it doesn’t mean we can’t ask for help and find support in those around us. Through friends, family, and other relationships we can find the encouragement we need to achieve unconditional self-acceptance.
4 Self-Acceptance Exercises
Self-acceptance doesn’t happen overnight, but incorporating the following exercises into your self-care routine is a great way to begin your journey.
1. Set Goals & Embrace Growth
As humans, we’re meant to grow and change throughout our lives. Rather than shying away from growing and exploring who you are, try embracing new feelings, activities, and positive changes. The journey to self-acceptance isn’t linear, and it’s likely to result in some changes. When these changes happen, don’t be afraid or ashamed, instead celebrate yourself and share your feelings with others who support you.
Setting goals is a great way to encourage yourself to explore and grow. Try making a list of realistic goals and create a plan of how you can reach them. These goals don’t need to be drastic changes or achievements, remember that even small victories can go a long way in making us feel better about ourselves.
If you’re not sure where to start, consider the hurdles you struggle with daily, and think about what you can do to overcome them.
2. Affirm Who You Are With Daily Affirmations
Affirmations are short, written statements that help boost our self-esteem and teach us self-compassion. When you are stressed, anxious, or struggling in other ways, you can repeat the affirmations to yourself as a way to cope with what you’re feeling. People have found practicing daily affirmations can also help with managing panic attacks.
Daily affirmations are also a great way to break free from negative talk and thoughts. By repeating them each day, you begin to reframe your thoughts, encouraging positivity and acceptance rather than judgment.
Typically, these are statements you come up with based on your needs and emotions. However, generalized affirmations can be used as well. If you need inspiration, consider starting with some of these:
- I am a strong, capable person
- I have done difficult things in the past, and I can do them again
- I deserved to be loved and to love others
- I am allowed to feel upset, angry, and sad sometimes – that’s part of being human
- I am proud of myself and will continue to strive to do well
- I appreciate my body and all it does for me
- I love my mind, my dreams, and the goals I have set for myself
- I am capable of making healthy choices
- I am allowed to take up space, to have desires, and to have a voice
- I know my worth
- I accept myself for who I am
- Today, I will do my best
Remember, just because others may not value your feelings or identity, that doesn’t mean they aren’t valid. It’s important to express yourself and take pride in who you are. Finding others who share the same values and interests as you can help you learn how to celebrate yourself fully and look forward to your future.
3. Establish a Safe Environment & Support System
Creating an environment of safety both internally (within yourself) and externally (in your surroundings) is crucial to achieving total self-acceptance. If we don’t feel safe, we’re more likely to hold ourselves back and even hide parts of who we are.
Sometimes, we need to stop and think about the people in our lives and the roles they play. Try asking yourself who makes you feel safe, loved, and comfortable. Oftentimes, these are the individuals who can help you when practicing self-acceptance. Everyone needs help from time to time, and having a support system you can rely on ensures that when you’re struggling, you aren’t going through it alone.
4. Practice Being Vulnerable & Forgiving Yourself
Practicing vulnerability may not be easy, but it’s essential for total self-acceptance. When we practice being vulnerable, we deepen our relationship with ourselves and learn to accept our feelings and emotions. You can practice vulnerability through mindfulness and meditation by simply sitting, letting yourself be, and noticing how you feel.
Doing this also helps you process challenging emotions. Hiding your feelings can be toxic and can hold you back from accepting yourself. If you’re having trouble navigating difficult emotions, consider writing them down or seeking help from a professional.
No one is perfect, and therefore everyone has made mistakes. When we hold onto past mistakes, we allow guilt and shame to take control of our lives. It’s important to remind ourselves that what we’ve done in the past is not who we are.
Forgiving ourselves provides a sense of peace and helps us develop self-compassion for mistakes we make in the future. As we grow and change, we are bound to fall short at times, but self-acceptance is about acknowledging these shortcomings and being able to move forward despite them.
If you or someone you know is struggling with a mental health condition, contact us to see how our team can provide you with the relief you deserve.
